“Friendships Cause Heartbreaks Too”

This is Day One of, “Thirty Days of Haydee” and I must admit this is a little scary for me. Why you may ask? Because vulnerability is my enemy. But why blog about 30 days of me… if I’m not going to be ME. So here goes nothing.

I wanted to start with Friendship Breakups because I don’t think we speak about it enough. Have you ever experienced a breakup with a friend? Throughout my life, I have moved around a lot.. and I mean A LOT! To the point that it became easy for me to meet other kids in school and easily detach when it was time to move again.

At some point when I was 12 years old, I reached some sort of stability in my life. I was able to make friends in school and build meaningful friendships with some dope kids at the time. It felt great! And it continued all throughout High School.

As an adult, I maintained some of those friendships I made as a teenager and some of them deteriorated. It is what it is.. that’s life! But just because it’s a part of life, doesn’t mean it would hurt any less. Here comes the emotional part of this blog…. 🥴

The process of healing from a friendship breakup is similar to the process of healing from a romantic relationship. We cry, feel our feelings, miss them, reminisce on the good times. And eventually we learn to live life without that person and move on. Just because we are no longer friends, doesn’t mean we are enemies. But sometimes, we outgrow one another, take different paths or even realize that this other persons lifestyle is no longer conducive to ours.

In other instances, the breakup is a lot more unpleasant. Lies, betrayal and jealousy are factors that caused the breakup and the trust that once lied within the friendship, no longer exists. For a person like myself, (whose as loyal as my Leo rising) that is a crucial component in my friendships. TRUST AND LOYALTY! The moment my trust is broken or you are deemed disloyal in my eyes, I never look at you the same twice.

I have been in long term relationships before and the same applies. Therefore, I process the fallout as I would the fallout of a romantic partner. I go over everything that transpired. I cry it out. I write. I blame myself and even get angry with myself for allowing someone close enough to hurt me.

But with each passing day, I realize that people are to be experienced. Each person who enters our lives are meant to teach us something. Whether about life or about ourselves. They’ll either be around for a chapter of our lives or they’ll be around for the entire book. Whatever the reason is, we learn to appreciate the lesson and make meaning out of the experience.

❤️‍🔥